DAY EIGHT: EVER FEEL LIKE AN IDIOT?

So… Do you? ‘Cause I do. In fact today I do. Actually I often feel as though I am an idiot, but today I have proof, empirical and absolute proof. [Having delayed the moment of truth here quite long enough, I shall finally tell you what I have done.]

I ran out of gas. Literally. Driving down the New York State Thruway and all of a sudden the car is slowing down, gas pedal not having any effect, automatic transmission downshifting, the whole nine yards. And I had just passed an exit. Yes, I am an idiot.

Now in my defense, the exit only had a sign for diesel – though it did have gas as well. And there was a service area – i.e. a non-exit gas station thing – another two miles ahead. And we has just gone through Buffalo, where the gas stations at exits seemed rather scarce to the wife and me. But still, it remains, I feel like an idiot.

On the bright side I have been reminded of something by this event – or reintroduction to idiocy, as I prefer to call it – something I learned a long time ago. When you feel like an idiot, just smile and ignore it, perhaps pull out a book if that seems appropriate, maybe even hum a little. [For all of you playing along with the home version of the game, this strategy only works if you are not, in fact, an actual idiot.] I used to have this feeling a lot: middle school, high school, college – well… let's just say a lot – but as of late [since arriving in New York, let’s say] I thought I had been doing better on the feeling like an idiot front. But then I had to go and run out of gas, call AAA, and have someone bring some gas so that we might resume our forward progress. I even had to have the wife get out in the cold and deal with my idiocy since opening the driver side door out towards the rapidly approaching traffic seemed an unnecessary further idiocy.

So, gentle reader, heed my warning; automobiles do, in fact, run out of gasoline. Neither the wife nor I really believed that they did, but they do. And if yours does, you shall assuredly join me in feeling like an idiot. So, if this should occur to you, my recommendation is to have a very nice person with you to laugh at yourself about it and a decent book to read to pass the time until AAA can find their way to you.