WHATEVER HAPPENED TO OZZIE AND HARRIET: PART ONE – OH...
*Click here to download jpeg of the gallery version of this essay.
I never before realized the power of the word “Oh.” Not the big “OH!” you get when you surprise someone or do something really nifty, but that vaguely disappointed “oh…” you hear when someone feels awkward and doesn’t quite know what to say.
Let me explain a bit. I recently quit my job teaching in Iowa to move back to New York and live with my wife. [I couldn’t be happier.] So now I am the house spouse, which is just fine with me. I am volunteering for a congressional candidate, getting work done in the studio, doing the cooking and cleaning and – most importantly – I am living with my wife for the first time since before we got married.
Which brings us to “oh…”
Over the past two weeks we have been to a number of events with my wife’s colleagues, which is where the “oh…s” occur. They ask me what I do and I tell them one thing or another: “I’m an artist” or “I am working for such-and-such candidate” or “I am her [my wife’s] house-spouse” [or some combination thereof]. That is when I get the “oh…” They realize I don’t have an actual job. I am a trailer…
At first it kind of amazed me that they were giving me “oh…s.” How could these people behave so stereotypically? I could feel their expectations upon me: “But you’re a 33-year old man, shouldn’t you have a job?”
Then I realized something. I don’t think this was what they were saying at all, at least not all of them – I think at least one or two were saying what I thought they were saying. Most of them simply hit a dead-end. Nothing more to say. “oh…”
It was me, and I am amazed. I have internalized the “oh…” That first time I heard it and it struck that chord; now it keeps rattling around in there. I now dread being asked “What do you do?” and I can’t believe it. I would never have thought I would have a problem with being the house-spouse. Don’t get me wrong. I am so happy I am here; I certainly wouldn’t trade it for being back in Iowa. It just took me by surprise that, well, I bought in.
“oh…”
5 Comments:
Sounds to me as though it's time to make some art, no? Build a sculpture; do a painting; bust out something amazing.
I don't mean to be a pollyanna about it. I do mean to point out that part of the "oh" is probably unexpressable envy on their parts--time! to do something! Just be careful that your time isn't too unfettered.
That is actually the precise plan I just put together talking with the wife. Bravo!
p.s. this is actually part one in a print suite that is step one in trying to make something amaing for once.
I like that image very, very much. I also like the use of dymo labels.
Damnit. I accidentally posted that comment twice; there wasn't anything exciting in the one I just deleted, in other words.
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