SOMETIMES THE WORLD IS SMALL

Today is one of those days: it is raining, the wife is out of town, every single Rocky movie seems to be on in sequence on TNT, and I am still in my pajamas [boxers and a t-shirt]. At least that was true up until about fifteen minutes ago: I put on my boots. I cannot quite recall exactly what the impetus was for donning the boots – a lovely pair of Frye Harness boots [I found them cheap on Ebay] – but since I did I somehow feel large. I know that the moment I were step out my front door I would spontaneously shrink, but I haven’t done that. Instead I stomp around my apartment in my big-boots feeling large in my very small world.

I think I should do this more often, perhaps even when the wife is around.

Perhaps not.

This may be a private thing; the inherent contradiction here is duly noted. Another person might make the world too large, expand it beyond the performance by Mr T as Clubber Lang in my fifteenth or sixteenth viewing of Rocky III [I must admit that that number may actually be too low], beyond the bran muffin I have still not gotten around to eating for breakfast, beyond the fact that I am in a soft pair of grey cotton boxers and my big-boots.

Normally these are just my boots, one of several pairs of boots. Today they are resolutely my big-boots for my small world. I would assumedly be able to compare this to some childhood incident of playing dress up, but I honestly can’t remember one. I don’t remember a lot. Perhaps that is the lure of this today; for all I know this may be the first time I have had the big-boots experience. I may be breaking new ground – pardon me while I stomp around with all due pomp for a moment.

STOMP! STOMP! STOMP!

I’m back. Thank you for your indulgence. I thought about fashioning a scepter or rod or something of the like, but decided that was unnecessary – at least for today. Today is not about fantasizing; it is about being; it is about being large, gigantic, enormous, big. The whole wide world is large, but today my world is small. And in my big-boots I am even larger. Never mind that I look foolish in my underwear; my world has no one else to see. Forget that I am still hungry for breakfast, even at this hour; food is mine for the taking and ever so close in my small world – just a few strides from desk to kitchen in my big-boots.

Today, indeed, my world is small. Many days that is simply too creepy, too claustrophobic; but today I feel big – at least I do now. Maybe later I will shrink again – perhaps I will go out or decide to wear pants. As of yet I am not sure. But I do know that when Clubber Lang pushes Mickey over before the fight I will be standing there in my big-boots scowling at Mr T, and I will be large.